Even Better.

Last time I mentioned how good fridays were because I could see men in Baju Melayu.

But hell.

Mondays are even better.

Suits. Suits everywhere.


But of course. No one can beat this man right here. Permanent of resident of my heart for nearly nine years.

Hellooo hotness. 

Sure you're turning 30 this year?

Discontinued Stories.

So I was cleaning out my room yesterday( Which I would write a full blogpost on cos believe me you're gonna wanna hear what I've found and what I've done) and I found an old book with all my stories I've written and discontinued. 

And well, I mean I knew my English wasn't exactly the best back then but I didn't think it was that bad. 

Apparently it was. 

Hm. 

When I did a read through of all the stories I've written and cringe at the bad choices of words and the bad writing in general, I realize how arrogant I was back then to think that what I wrote was good enough to be published as a book (If I ever did finish it back then) and become a best seller. 

Well it was either arrogance or adolescent's naivety. One thing for sure I would have embarrassed myself if I ever did bring my work to any publishing house at that time. It was just that bad. 

I was beyond embarrassed over what I wrote and how I've written it, but I never thought the idea or the plot line I have for my stories were bad. And I even dared to think, right at this moment, if I just polish my writing skills I could actually enhance and expand the concepts even further. When I look back at all the stories I was intrigued to know what happens next despite the tacky and oh-so-obvious-written-by-a-teenager paragraphs.

All of this made me realize a thing about talent and hard work. That they work side by side and sometimes talent isn't even needed if you work hard enough. If you want it bad enough. And I guess I didn't. That's why I gave up halfway through all my stories. That's why I can't write brilliantly like all the authors I've admired. Because I didn't give enough effort. Because I thought if I don't have the talent to write why bother. And that in itself proves that I don't have enough passion to be a writer. Heck I don't even deserve to say that I like writing. 

Because I was lazy. 

And that my dear friend, is the worst talent anybody could have, 

...

Due to internet connection difficulties, I have no choice but to blog about each day a day late okaay it's not that I've forgotten my resolution or the promise I made to myself but because of unavoidable circumstances I can't do anything but wait and hope that the internet connection at my house will be okay again soon so I can blog peacefully again. Haih. 

Dayum.

Do you know what's the best thing about Fridays?

Boys in Baju Melayu. 

On the bright side

Ughh I hate working. The long hours. The fussy customers. The waking up early in the morning. I hate it the fact that I have to work EVERYTIME sem break rolls around just so I'd have money to go out with friends or to buy anything for myself. 

But as always, let's try and look at the bright side so that I won't feel as suckish and emo everytime I have to wake up at 6 just so I have enough time to do my prayers and get ready for work. 

You get money. 

I mean that should be enough perk to make you get a job during your sem break. Unless your parents give you an allowance of RM1500 per month and you can go out with your friends without any worries of your wallet becoming empty  after just one outing. 

I MOVE. 

As in "At least I'm doing something and moving and walking instead of just sitting at home doing nothing but increasing the roundness of my belly" See I'm trying REALLY HARD to feel better about working here. Cos seriously I would love to do nothing. 

The eye candies. 

See I'm not saying USM doesn't have any eye candy, *cough* Daffodil *cough*. But it is deprived of good looking men. Really deprived. 

And so seeing SO MANY GOOD LOOKING BOYS FOR six straight hours is just the kind of motivation I need to get through everyday. Maybe not enough, but atleast they make the long hours bearable. DO NOT FRET (though i'm not sure why you would) I'm not even trying to look for a potential soulmate, just a view that brings sparkles to the eyes and a smile to the lips. 

The free breakfast, 

Yes I get free breakfast. I don't think I need to elaborate further. 

AND the best part is that I only need to work from 7 a.m until 1 pm which to me is just awesome since my previous jobs usually require me to at least work until 6 p.m. and the pay is still somewhat the same. Though I have to admit, though it's only untill one, time seems to be going at A VERY SLOW PACE when I'm working. Like incredible slow. Snail slow. 

Truthfully though, the reason I even agreed to the job when my mom told me about it is because I'm trying to save up money to go to Korea next year. I've been waiting for nearly ten years to set foot on that land. Waaaaaay way before kpop got popular. I mean dude I was a fan of the korean music even before it got famous. 2006 was the exact year in fact, 

And I realize that I haven't exactly done anything or put any effort to achieve my dreams and if only I realize this sooner I wouldn't have wasted the money I got from my jobs on useless petty things. I could've start saving up sooner and I could've gone this year with all the money I accumulated. But ah well, I was a teenager, and I was just itching to spend. Not thinking at all about the long term sequences. 

But you knows, what's past is past. 

The future is yet to be determined and if back then all I did was dream about going, this time I should actually give all my effort to make it happen. 

I  actually have a list of places I'd like to go if I have the money. Korea would be number 1 of course, UK would be second. and the whole Europe continent. before exploring US. Only then I can conquer Asia's countries. 

I'll make it happen. 

I will. 

I Got A Job.

So I got a job. At UiTM Puncak Alam.

It's just a small job at a food kiosk. 

But I really need the money and the working hours and pay is good so I have to just close one eye on my previous dream of having one month sem break doing nothing but eat ice cream and get fat at home. 

B1A4 Malaysia Fanmeet 2015 Scandal : A View From A Veteran Fangirl

So there's been a lot of talk going around about this particular issue. Especially from Malaysia's local press and call me ignorant, going against my own religion, whatever you want, but I'll still say this issue has gone out of hand and out of proportion. People are making such a big deal over such a small and unimportant issue.

One thing about Malaysians is that they like to accuse and blame sides without assessing the situations first. Without knowing what truly happened and without having any solid proof and prior knowledge that relates to the occurences. And when the pictures and videos of those girls being kissed on the cheek backhugged by B1A4 members were made public, the public was quick to blame it on the ENTIRE KPOP COMMUNITY saying they're spreading evil, and badmouthed the girls. Again, without assessing the situation.

One local press even used the word molesting and sexual harassment, further stating that the girls were so infatuated by kpop that they lost all sense of dignity and self preservation. That they have forgotten the limits set by religion. I don't know how this statement actually supports the word "molest" here so I'm just going to assume that they don't know the real definition behind said word because this is what happens when you don't try to assess the situation first and get your bloody facts straight.

First of all, the members of B1A4 had ASKED for permission from the girls themselves beore they touch the girls. And the girls had given them their permission. So I don't think it's considered sexual harassment if both sides are willing participants. But then again, the context of sexual harassment in this country has always been quite vague if you know what I mean.

Second of all, B1A4 are just celebrities that are doing what they thought as fanservice. A way to interact and please and appreciate their fans. THIS IS A NORMAL THING in THEIR CULTURE and they have no prior knowledge of what is and isn't appropriate in context of Islam. Even if they did know a little bit, if the girls themselves had given their consents, who are they to reject the humble wishes of their owns fans? I feel sorry for B1A4 mostly because they are getting such bad press about this when all they did was just fanservice. When all they were trying to do was give the fans good memories.

Now I'm going to talk about the investigation that Jakim has set on this particular incident saying that the organiser did not follow the set of rules that has been laid out for such events, further supporting the claim that this has been an act of sexual harassment. The organiser is an organisation mostly run by women, do you really think they want to see these girls get sexually harassed? Again, accusing without assessing.

And the public isn't helping either, bashing the girls at every social media corner they can find. Bashing kpop because they bring everything evil to the country and honestly I was starting to lose my patience on everyone. Never had I rant about a certain issue on twitter as bad as this one just because everything that everyone is saying is wrong. It's so so wrong. And this time, I just can't be on the neutral side.

I was ready to let go of the issue after 24 hours of giving my own two cents on twitter, but then Jawi came out with a statement that the girls have to step out and admit who they are to help with "further investigations" and they have to pay a fine of RM 1, 000 or be sentenced to jail for 6 months.

After that I lost my shit.

I completely lost it.

Ok fine, what the girls did was wrong and it is right for the public to say that they went overboard but to give them such punishment for an issue like this is just plain excessive and unnecessary I think. They're doing it under the akta of obscene acts in public. To give them such punishment because of a mere back hug or a kiss on the cheek when the local's own entertainment industry has done much worse things in the name of entertainment is just absurd and unfair. If you really want to punish people for obscene acts in public then I suggest you start with Malaysian artists first because they're the ones who know the halal haram in Islam. Have ilmu in Islam but still do all those things in the name of work. Yet I don't see Jakim giving any attention to them, as if it's ok because they're malaysians and local? Tell me then what's the difference between the skinships of these girls and B1A4 with the skinship shown on tv? Tell. Me. Putting girls behind bars for what seemed to be an honest mistake and can be solved through a discussion is equivalent to north koreans giving death sentence to their own people for watching south korean entertainment. and yes it happened.

Honestly what's happening here is just plain hatred. Hatred towards everything in the name of korean entertainment because it brings obsession. A hatred that has turned people blind over the real issue here.

And the fact that they're hashtagging #MenentangKejahatanKpop on twitter like that mere incident represents the entire kpop community is showing how hypocritical Malaysians can be. They get so mad when the rest of the world label ALL Muslims as terrorist due to a small group of them. But don't you see that you're doing the exact same thing? Taking a small group of something so large to represent the entire community. And it's just not right. You wonder why people all around the world stereotype muslims. You wonder and get mad when there are people accused all those who wear hijabs are terrorists. But they're just assuming based on what the media has fed them. Based on what they've seen without further assessment. And you malaysians, are doing the exact same thing. I'm not saying all Malaysians but you know yourself la kan.

If you want to justify why a certain act is wrong is alright, but to have it cloud your judgment over everything and talking about things that are completely out of context, now that I can't tolerate.

To conclude I think what the girls did was wrong, but I think how Jawi and the public are handling it is unprofessional and unjust as well.

As a kpop fan more than nine years, I would like to apologize to all other fans out there for all the commotions that my country has created, and I would like to personally apologize to B1A4 for all misunderstandings. Just know you guys did nothing wrong as you did ask for permission and you were just doing your job as an artist. As idols who want to show their appreciation to their fans. I apologize from the bottom of my heart.

I'm not saying you can't advise the girls or say that what the girls did are wrong but there are ways to do it and showing their faults in public is not how Islam has taught us. 

I hope the people who spread the pictures with intentions of shaming the girls are happy because I guess you got what you wanted.

Seriously if they do have to pay a fine of one thousand ringgit or be put behind bars over this issue then don't ever talk to me about justice again Malaysia because you're not doing a very good example of it.

This and That.

Because Penang doesn't have Carls. Jr so naturally this was the first thing I looked for when I touch KL soil. I miss my favourite fast food joint.

I was suppose to blog about this particular post about two days ago cos this is about my first day of sem break, but priorities changed you know how it is.

First day of sem break... was not boring to say the least. I got my carls jr.

And omg the best part was that I finally got my own tub of green tea ice cream which I just couldn't get enough of  for the past few months. Weird thing though, I don't know if I've suddenly got a green tea fetish or something but when I got home I realize everything that I bough was green tea flavored.

I only bought three things at the supermarket.

A shampoo : Follow Me Green Tea

Tea : Green Tea

Ice Cream : Green Tea.


Ntah la maybe it's like that time I WAS SO head over heels for dark chocolate after I tasted it for the first time I ended up eating at least once in three days for a few months jugak.


And I don't know if I've mentioned in my previous posts about me wanting to do nothing for the whole one month of this sem break, but yeah, it ain't gon happen unfortunately. Just got a job at UiTM P. Alam jaga kiosk. But hey look at the bright side, at least I'm getting money kan?

Serious talk though I kinda need to restrain myself from using my salary at all cos I have a mission man. Mission of going to Korea next year. And I want it to happen so bad.

Ughh hari ni ramblings macam kepala x tentu because yes my head is currently a mess right now.

Later. 

Tired

First day of Sem Break?

One word.

Green Tea.

And Carls. Jr.

Ahaks.

Tired beyond.

Will update tomorrow.

Cos It's almost midnight and I need to post this up before the next day comes I ain't making the same mistake *take one long deep breath*

One Month Of Nothingness Please.

So finals just ended. 

And ok technically it's already the tenth but you can't  blame me. I had a paper from nine to eleven and then I had to go settle some St. John business and by three my mom has already arrived on campus and I HAVEN'T PACKED A THING. So I didn't even have time to switch on my laptop and blog. And I planned to get to it once I reached home, it's pass midnight now so yeah. Unavoidable circumstances. But I did have a resolution of blogging for each day and I am not going to break it now. 

So again,

Finals just ended. And again I feel nothing. Nada. Zeros. Maybe because I haven't celebrated yet so I'm not really feeling the mood of sem break yet which is only a month by the way so nothing to get overly excited about anyway. 

I honestly thought that my mom would arrive at night and we'd go back on the tenth in the morning. So it came as a surprise to me when she told me that she was already in Penang that morning. And well, I was kinda bummed cos I was planning to go out right after the final paper. First party people ajak keluar makan seoul garden and Syud whatsapped me about going out as well. And it's been a while since I lepak with Syud anyways so macam ok cool bole lepak before going back. So I felt really sorry for her when I had to tell her that I can't go cos I'm going back as soon as I'm done packing. Haih.

Honestly,

I want to do nothing for this one month break. Mainly because I've been working my ass off during my first semester at USM and I haven't had a proper break since. But my mom has already given me contacts of people that I can call to ask for a job. Of course, I mean I thought it was ridiculous cos

I mean

A MONTH JE KOT. 

Then I figured if  I sit at home for a month I'd just gain back all the weight I've shed. And the extra income definitely wouldn't hurt. I have plans to go to Korea next year so I really need the money. Plus I need a new phone. The artifact I'm using right now is just not working anymore. I mean thanks for the past four years but I'm ready to move on. Ahah. 

Ok enough rambling for a night. 

We'll see how the first day of my sem break goes tomorrow.