Maybe next time?

It doesn't look like it right now but I have a lot of work that needs to be done and be submitted. 

And I have next to nil motivation to do any of it. Which is probably the case almost every semester. unlike all of my other coursemates I don't have a 3.5 cgpa and so I either have to pick up the slack or be in danger of getting left behind. all alone. 

That thought alone terrifies me. 

Talking about workload and assignment burdens, it has also become the cause for me not being able to go back home at all until this semester ends, seeing as how we do not have semester break as well. Which sucks real bad cos Ama is coming back from UK in a few days and blood sisters are planning to meet up next weekend. Alea is having it rough this past few months. Hajar is having a tough time adjusting to degree life in Seremban. And Ama is coming back. It's the perfect time to gather actually, and rant about everything that is wrong in each of our lives. 

But alas, USM has a knack for keeping me here as long as she can. Now going as far as destroying every chance I might have to go back and meet my blood sisters. 

Honestly though I have never gone through a sem where I don't go back home and meet blood sisters. It's what keeps me going for the rest of the sem. Going back and meeting them is like rehabilitation. You refresh your memory. rejuvenate your mind. before you need to go to back to war and survive because there are people rooting for you to get out alive. 

And the fact that I am not going to see them at all until the semester finishes. It's kind of a new challenge for me. 

Though I have to say it's not as bad here as it used to be. I used to be a zombie. Going out of my mind just because I realize I have another 3 years here. Now though it's getting better. I'm adjusting and USM doesn't seem so bad anymore. Plus the fact that this is going be the last semester for St. John activities helps IMMENSELY. 

And also I have a few friends here that keeps me sane from day to day thank god. 

Actually they keep me more than sane. And for once I realize why I never regretted coming to USM. I wouldn't have met them if I had decided UM and that would be a waste of great friends I never got the chance to know and cherish(eww)

Honestly though, thanks for being here. in USM. with me. You're going to have a lot of bad luck so tell me when you're done. But in the mean time.

Thank you.